How to Develop Leadership Skills in Your Children

This is a guest post by Jane Thompson. Jane is a writer and content manager for Uphours, an online resource with information about businesses. She loves running and reading history books, especially about World War II and the Middle Ages.

 

Leadership Skills for Kids

We live in a world where powerful leaders are capable of accomplishing great things. No one is born a leader – it’s something that people of worthy character grow to be through their experiences. Everyone deserves to be equipped with the leadership skills they need to make a positive impact in the world. Your children are never too young to learn the foundations of what leadership means.

Here are six ways to develop leadership skills in your children:

 

1. Increase Access to Information

Many parents feel the need to shelter their children, or censor them from a lot of things. Rather than cutting off access to that information, try to explain it in an age-appropriate way. If there’s a troubling issue happening in the world, allowing your child to see that and understand why an issue is troubling may inspire innovative thinking. Children are the heroes of the future, and you can’t lead the world without that kind of brainpower.

“Today a reader, tomorrow a leader.” -Margaret Fuller

 

2. Allow Your Authority to Be Questioned

This may feel counterintuitive, but it may be the best thing for your household. Rather than relying on the failsafe “because I said so” response, explain why. Allow your child to ask further questions and barter. Their bartering points won’t always work, but allow them to win these debates when there isn’t much at stake. This will teach your child to negotiate, which is a crucial skill for a leader.

 

“Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers.”-Voltaire

 

3. Inspire Your Children to Work with Teams

Group activities allow children to understand how a hierarchy works, particularly if roles within these groups shift. Perhaps every child has a turn to choose the activity for team playdates. Children are most likely to select something they feel they’re good at. Everyone will have a chance to learn, and everyone will have a chance to teach. Good leaders need to be willing to learn from others.

 

“No individual can win a game by himself.” -Pele

 

4. Teach Your Children to Accept Losses

How to Find Your Voice as a Leader

Learn to be an Influential Leader

Do you want to increase your influence?

Do you want to find your voice?

Do you want to be a more powerful leader?

Of course you do.

 

“Find your voice and inspire others to find theirs.” –Stephen Covey

 

Learning to be an effective, influential leader is a lifelong goal for most of us. That’s why I read all I can from as many different sources as possible.

Coach, consultant, and speaker Paul Larsen believes that anyone can become a more powerful leader. His new book, Find Your Voice as a Leader, offers a model to help everyone become a better leader. Paul’s many corporate roles, including Chief Human Resources Officer for a $3 billion organization, makes him an ideal teacher. I recently asked him to share his experience and the research in his new book.

 

“Speak with intent so that you can lead with vision.” –Paul Larsen

  

Find Your Voice as a Leader

What does it mean to “find your voice”?

As an executive coach, I partner with leaders across all industries and within all types of organizations.  I have found that a resulting impact of the politics and the normative structures of organizations is that the creative talents, or voices, of leaders are stifled into an expected pattern of behavior.  Leaders learn quickly that to succeed is to “go with the flow” and not make waves.  Their unique voice can be easily silenced.

Thus, many leaders get lost in the noise of today’s chaotic business environment. They remain quiet instead of speaking up, even when they have an opinion. They follow someone else’s decision instead of doing what they really want to do. They let the chatter in their head get the best of them, and they end up second guessing every action or step they take. Or they remain with the status quo instead of taking any action at all. They hide behind others instead of making their own decisions.

To “find your voice as a leader” is to create a compelling and unique leadership brand by:

– Discovering your critical leadership VALUES;

– Creating a compelling vision to get the OUTCOMES you desire;

– Building relationships with INFLUENCE and credibility;

– Making decisions that reveal your COURAGE to take a stand;

– Communicating your overall EXPRESSION to create a lasting legacy.

 

Study: 70 to 80% of people can be trained to be effective leaders.

 

Define Your Core Beliefs and Values

How do you define leadership values?

Your values are your core beliefs and ideals that guide your decisions, your worldview, your insights, your actions, and your communications. Your values are the principles you believe are important in the way you live and work. They determine your priorities, and, deep down, they are the measures you use to tell if your life is turning out the way you want it to. When your actions and beliefs match your values, life is usually good— you’re satisfied and content. This is the primary reason identifying your values is so important. Values exist, whether you recognize them or not. Yet, your leadership impact will be much more confident and stronger when you know and acknowledge your values and when you make plans and decisions that honor them.

 

What happens when our values are in conflict?  

When your actions and beliefs match your values, life is usually good— you’re satisfied and content. However, when the environment and the accompanying actions and beliefs don’t align with your values, life feels out of sorts, and it can be a real source of discontent and unhappiness. This misalignment of our values is one of the core sources of dis-engagement at work and occurs on a very regular basis. We make compromises on a daily basis, and within our corporate environment, we make compromises as they pertain to values when matched against the values of the organization. But when these compromises are made on a consistent basis and/or the compromises create a very large “values gap” between the individual and the organization, this can result in a feeling of dis-engagement and lack of commitment. And it will not be solved until the individual decides to take deliberate action on this compromise and ask, “Is this the type of environment that will provide me the ability to do my best work or do I need to plan for a change?”

 

“Leadership is influence.” –John C. Maxwell

 

How does identifying your values set you apart from other leaders? 

We are all governed by a set of values that act as our “inner GPS.”  Our values govern our decisions, our judgments, our communication and our overall worldview.  They shape who we are.  Leaders who identify their core set of values and lead out front with their values are more confident, more courageous and more influential versus leaders who do not. Values are more than just a “set of words on a laminated card,” they are the core DNA of every leader and are the ingredients of the legacy each leader leaves behind.

 

Don’t Get Marooned on Intention Island

Strategies to Accelerate the Growth of Your Leaders

When You Need Leaders Fast

Talent.

Most of us leading organizations are thinking about it all the time. Great strategy means nothing if you don’t have the people to make it happen.

If you want to lead, if you want to accelerate your growth, if you want to energize your company, you need to have a talent management system that produces leaders.

In Leaders Ready Now: Accelerating Growth in a Faster World, authors Matthew Paese, Ph.D., Audrey B. Smith, Ph.D., and William C. Byham, Ph.D. share their collective wisdom about talent and leadership. All three authors are employed by DDI helping organizations grow their own leaders.

I recently spoke with Matt about the new book and the extensive research on talent and growing leaders in organizations.

 

Study: Leadership readiness is stagnant even among companies with leadership programs.

 

Managing Talent in Your Organization

What’s working and not working with today’s talent management systems?
What’s working is that we know how to build processes, tools, and technology to help leaders learn.  What’s not working is that all this “stuff” fails to generate the energy that fuels real growth.  In fact, more often than not, the initiatives that are put in place to accelerate the growth of talent drain energy instead of creating it.

The learning experiences that leaders describe as the most beneficial are not necessarily the ones that we design for them. They tend to be the ones that happen on the fly. So we have to find ways to make the tools, technology and learning experiences that we design more useful and powerful on a day-to-day basis.

 

Potential is not performance. Potential is not readiness.

 

Make Leadership Development A Top Priority

With the increasing pressure to deliver immediate financial results, some leaders may discount leadership development. How do you make it a top business priority and keep it there where it belongs even in tough times?

There is a simple answer to this one: keep score or don’t play.  But you can’t just keep score of anything. When we say ‘keep score,’ we mean something very specific. Frankly, this is where many companies get it wrong.  It’s important to remember that most organizations invest in development so that they can create more capability, and they need it now, but they don’t keep score that way.  It’s routine to see organizations declare growth-focused objectives while they only keep score of learning activity, engagement, or retention. It’s like scoring a basketball game by keeping track of how many players are on the court. It’s just not the right metric. Eventually people lose interest and frustration sets in, so programs become difficult to sustain.

A classic example of keeping score of the wrong thing is tracking how many people have development plans or how many people were satisfied with a learning initiative. Those may be interesting metrics, but they don’t say much about what happened to leadership capability as a result of the effort.

 

“Each time you give up on a leader, you drain energy from your acceleration system.”

 

A measure of growth tracks the application of what has been learned or may keep track of changes in leadership readiness. For example, some organizations have begun scoring ‘conversions,’ which involve converting a leader from ‘not ready’ to ‘ready now.’ If you set targets against conversions (instead of learning activity or engagement) and establish clear accountability for who is responsible for generating them, the dynamics of a leadership acceleration system change dramatically, and management becomes much more competitive (in a good way) about growing talent.

 

Accelerating Talent Growth

1: Commit: adopt acceleration as a business priority.

2: Aim: define leadership success for your business context.

3: Identify: make efficient, accurate decisions about whom to accelerate.

4: Assess: accurately evaluate readiness gaps and give great feedback.

5: Grow: make the right development happen.

6: Sustain: aggressively manufacture the energy for growth.

 

Talk about leadership context and why it matters to leadership development.

In today’s environment, business context means constant change. This means that development needs to move at the speed of change. Learning content, and the tools, support, and technology that leaders need to apply it, must be directly applicable to their most pressing challenges. They simply don’t have time or mindshare to engage in the sort of extracurricular development that traditionally characterized leadership development.

If formal learning is to make a positive business difference, it must be supported by readily available and easy-to-use tools, job aids, technology, networks, and management support. Organizing these assets isn’t rocket science, but when it’s done right, the results show it.  Decades of experience and research have generated big data that now shows convincingly that a handful of the right principles and practices make a profound difference in the outcomes of leadership development that is built to be context-specific.

 

“Leadership is not a task. it is a role.”

 

Rethink Feedback

5 Choices to Make In Order to Live the Future, Strong

5 Tough Choices

What are the toughest choices you face as you lead yourself and others into the future?

That question was the focus of new, original research by Bill Jensen and his team. The research shows that certain choices will make you stronger and give you a brighter future. Bill has spent over twenty-five years learning how work gets done. In his latest book, Future Strong: How to Work Unleashed, Lead Boldly, and Live Life Your Way, he outlines these five choices and how the answers will shape your future.

 

Only 29% said they can achieve their dreams where they currently work.

 

Choice One: The Heartbeat of the Past

Let’s talk about the past. You ask, “Will you hear the heartbeat of your past choices?” How do we effectively learn from our past in the Future Strong way?

I’ve spent my whole life asking questions that nobody was asking.

There are already lots of people hyperventilating about how disruptive technologies — wearables, deep analytics, Internet of everything, artificial intelligence, robotics — are going to create futures that are amazingly different from today.

But no one was talking about the choices each of us must make to create our own future in the midst of all that. So my team and I interviewed and surveyed over seven thousand people across the globe, asking each person deeply personal questions about building personal futures.

One of those questions was, “What makes you, you?”

Bill JensenWe uncovered what leadership guru Warren Bennis once attributed to all great leaders — people who are Future Strong leverage their past as a tool to leap into their future. They call upon crucible moments from their past: experiences that forged or tested how they view the world. We found that most everyone who leaps into unknown futures, and boldly goes where they have not gone before, does so by calling upon the courage and wisdom from those crucible moments.

One e-learning pioneer learned how to be creative from her childhood friend Albert Einstein. One venture capitalist, who practices servant leadership, drew upon the kindness he received from strangers when he fled his war-torn country as a child. A media and technology leader learned fast decision-making from his teenage successes and crashes as a semi-pro skateboarder. Me…I call upon my mom’s death to truly appreciate how precious life is. Each of us has one or two or three life-altering moments we can call upon.

To effectively leverage those moments in our lives, we each must truly understand our own hero’s journey — moments from our past when change was thrusted upon us. Initially, most of us deny or resist the new truths; then there’s a moment — the crucible moment — where we embrace how to make that change part of who we are.

So hearing the heartbeat of your past choices is about truly knowing yourself well enough (by the way, about 80% of us think we know ourselves, but really don’t) to call upon deeper courage and wisdom than you thought you had.

 

“Focus on the only thing, past, present and future, within your control.” -Bill Jensen

 

Choice Two: Who To Become

7 Disciplines of A Leader

How to Help Your People, Team, and Organization Achieve

In the Seven Disciplines of a Leader, Jeff Wolf explores what leadership looks like when done right. Jeff has coached hundreds of leaders and offers his disciplines in order to benefit leaders at all levels of the organization.  I recently talked with Jeff about the leadership disciplines discussed in his book.

 

“Companies place the wrong leadership in the job 82 percent of the time.” –Forbes

 

How to Get Noticed

What advice do you give to someone who wants to stand out and get noticed as a leader in a large organization?

Learn what your company looks for in its leaders. See if there’s a competency model that identifies successful leaders’ strengths and characteristics. Study this model and be sure to practice the competencies. If no such model exists, seek out successful company leaders and talk with them to gain a better understanding of how they became successful.

You should also volunteer to lead small projects, which will provide useful leadership experiences and exposure. You’ll gain confidence and enhance the skill sets that are weak.

Always be curious. Seek new opportunities and experiences, and always be open to trying something out of your normal comfort zone.

I would encourage budding and aspiring leaders to create a plan, put it in writing, and then “work it.” Research proves that people who put their goals in writing are usually more successful.

Read as many books and attend as many training courses as possible, both within and outside of the company. Vary courses so you can experience a broad spectrum of leadership skills.

 

“A leader’s upbeat attitude is contagious and lifts morale.” -Jeff Wolf

 

There’s another important challenge to overcome: Learn the areas in which you must improve because we all have blind spots. We see some of our weaknesses, but it’s truly impossible to identify all of them.

It’s important for leaders to be positive and have a great attitude because they can either impart or sap energy. A leader’s upbeat attitude becomes contagious, lifting the morale of those around them. You can always teach skills, but you cannot always teach people how to be positive; they either have a great attitude or they don’t.

Be sure you are striving to work well with others and be aware how other people view you. When you stand up to speak in front of a group, do you exude confidence, present articulate, clear messages, and carry yourself well?

 

Coaching for Success

What is the most common reason someone calls you for coaching?

Coaching used to be thought of as a tool to help correct underperformance or, as I often call it, the “broken wing theory.” Today, coaching is used to support leaders, employees with high potential, and top producers in an effort to enhance individual capabilities.

We work in such a high-speed environment! Organizations are finally beginning to recognize the importance of helping leaders achieve critical business objectives in the shortest possible time, so they’re hiring me to speed personnel development.

I’m often brought into organizations to deal with a number of leadership issues. Providing feedback is one key area. As leaders move into greater levels of responsibility, they receive less—perhaps even no—feedback from others on their performance. The unfortunate consequence is stagnation. Critical leadership and interpersonal skills often reach certain levels, and the leader is given no opportunity to become an even better leader. Working one-on-one with an objective third-party coach offers these leaders a trusted advisor who can focus on behavioral changes that organizations are ill equipped to handle. Coaching develops extraordinary leaders. Extraordinary leaders produce extraordinary business results.

 

Have a Quick Impact as a New Leader

If you are a new manager, what are a few ways to have a quick impact?

Leadership is not rocket science. It comes down to living and leading by the golden rule: Do unto others as you want them to do unto you.1119003954

People make companies. As leaders, we often spend most of our time on strategy and improving bottom-line results, but what about our people? It’s our job, as leaders, to guide them, help them develop more skills, and increase productivity.

I think Walt Disney put it perfectly: “You can dream, create and design the most wonderful place in the world….but it takes people to make the dream a reality.”

For a quick impact, work to understand what your people want, not just what you want, and act accordingly. Ask your staff for their feedback with questions such as:

  • What can I do to make you happier here?
  • What do you find challenging about your work?
  • What’s energizing about your work?
  • How can I be a better leader for you to be successful?
  • What resources do you need that you currently don’t have?
  • What motivates you to work hard?
  • Do you feel appreciated and receive the praise and recognition you feel you deserve?

Often times a new leader’s first inclination is to become too friendly with people. After all, everyone wants to be liked. But by trying to become everyone’s friend, leaders run the risk of losing respect and influence. If your staff considers you to be one of the group, they may not respect your judgment on important issues.

Additionally, they may lose their motivation to achieve goals, fail to work hard, and assume deadlines are soft when they believe their “friend” will never reprimand them. That’s why leaders must avoid falling into the trap of becoming too friendly with their staff. The bottom line? You’re the boss—not a best friend! You cannot be objective and unbiased when staff members view you as a work pal.

 

“It takes people to make the dream a reality.” –Walt Disney

 

A Guide to Hiring Right