7 way to build confidence and cultivate resilience


A Masterclass in Resilience



I found myself needing to stop at a local mall. And I didn’t expect to hear someone shouting in such a hostile manner.

I heard the awful words and felt the sting in them before I even rounded the corner. When I turned to see what was happening, and saw her crying, I wasn’t sure what to do or say. Before I could react, she muttered to herself. Straining to hear, I picked up on the fact that she was repeating those awful words to herself.

I thought….“You are not those words. I don’t even know you, but I can see that it’s not true. Don’t give him your power.”

She somehow managed a smile before her friend showed up a moment later, and they embraced as she broke down again. Once I could tell she was in great hands, I was able to continue with my day.

One of Eleanor Roosevelt’s famous quotes is “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Sounds easy, but…it isn’t, especially in the moment.



In these simple words, she conveyed a profound truth about personal power, resilience, and self-confidence.

This tells us that the power to influence our feelings and self-perception resides within us, not in the words of others. It means that we control the narrative about our worth, value, and abilities. When we give others the authority to make us feel less than, we surrender our personal power.

So, what should we do when someone tries to make us feel inferior? Here’s a roadmap to build confidence, cultivate resilience, and reclaim personal power:


1. Practice Self-Awareness

Understand your triggers: Identify situations or comments that make you feel inferior. Understanding these triggers can help you better prepare and react to them.

Remember: Triggers are not a sign of weakness; they are a part of being human. Awareness of them is the first step towards control.


2. Foster a Positive Self-Image

Embrace your strengths: Recognize your unique abilities and the areas where you can improve. Having a balanced perspective on your abilities fosters self-esteem.

Remember: You are a work-in-progress, and it’s perfectly okay. Embracing your weaknesses as areas for growth will make you unstoppable.



3. Develop Emotional Intelligence

Control your reaction: When someone tries to belittle you, remember you have the power to control your emotional response.

Remember: Not every negative comment deserves your energy. Be selective with your emotional investments.



4. Set Personal Boundaries

Communicate your limits: It’s important to let people know what is and isn’t acceptable behavior towards you.

Remember: Setting boundaries is a sign of self-respect. You are teaching others how you want to be treated.



5. Practice Self-Affirmation

Boost your confidence with positive affirmations: Remind yourself daily of your worth, capabilities, and achievements.

Remember: Positive self-talk can change your outlook on life. Make it a daily ritual.



6. Surround Yourself with Positive Influences

Choose your company wisely: Surround yourself with people who inspire, encourage, and respect you.

Remember: You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.


7. Seek Professional Help When Necessary

Reach out to a professional if feelings of inferiority persist: There’s no shame in seeking help from psychologists or coaches to help you navigate your feelings and develop coping strategies.

Remember: Seeking help is not a sign of weakness, but rather a testament to your strength and commitment to personal growth.



Do not let anyone undermine your worth or potential. Instead, embrace the powerful words of Eleanor Roosevelt, and realize that no one can make you feel inferior without your consent.




Image Credit: Alex Shute

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