5 Tips to Master the Art of Power Listening

Power Tips from Ken Abraham

What does it take to land on the New York Times Bestseller’s list nineteen times, with three books hitting the number one spot?

This is the current record of one of my friends, Ken Abraham.  Not too long ago, I sat down with Ken to ask him about his phenomenal success.  Ken’s specialty is collaborations.  He works with celebrities, politicians, sports heroes and others to tell their stories.  He writes authentically in their voice, not his own.

I have known Ken for some years and will tell you a few things that he would never say, but they are characteristics that fuel his success.

Ken is what I call a “power listener.”

Power listeners:

1. Know that it is all about you.

Too often we listen faintly as we form another question or clever comment in our mind. We wait for the person to breathe so we can get our point in. Learning to listen well, extraordinarily well, has been a long-term goal of mine. I’m not even close to attaining it. Ken is a master.

Despite Ken’s success, he is one of the most humble people I know. That humility seems to work especially well in his work because Ken is more interested in learning about you than in talking about himself.

“Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you’d have preferred to talk.” –Doug Larson

 

 

2. Are able to communicate what they heard accurately.

Good communication is not about saying something. It’s not about the audience hearing it either. It’s when the listener understands your message and can repeat it back. It’s when that person understands the nuances, the emotion, and the content.

Ken’s ability to do this propels him to the top of the world’s greatest listeners.  His writing skills are amazing, but I believe it starts with his unique listening skills.  He can only capture an accurate and authentic story because of his listening mastery.

“I think part of my gift..is that I love listening.” –Eric Clapton

 

3. Stay in the present.

A good listener is not thinking about tomorrow’s to do list or yesterday’s meeting. A good listener is with you, in the moment, practicing the power of now.

When you speak with Ken, you just know he is right there. He is with you in the moment, listening and learning.

“So don’t ever worry about tomorrow. After all, tomorrow will worry about itself.” -Matt 6:34

The Only Question that Matters in Personal Branding

Managing A Personal Brand

My friend Robert D. Smith is a master of branding and a creative force. For decades, he has managed the career of best-selling author and speaker Andy Andrews.  In addition to his work with Andy, he is regularly sought after by some of the biggest names for his expert advice, creativity, and innovative approaches.

 

“Whether you think it or not, you are a brand.” @TheRobertD

 

Recently, I spent some time visiting with him in his home and office in Tennessee.  Most people know Robert as THE Robert D.  His energy is so intense that, to prepare, I downed a double espresso before our interview.  I shouldn’t have bothered because just talking with him is like plugging into an unending energy source.

In our video interview, you will hear THE Robert D’s advice on building a personal brand.

What’s the number one question that THE Robert D asks himself to know whether a person will succeed?  Drum roll….

Are you coachable?

Interestingly, when I hire an executive, that is also my number one question. Because if you are not teachable, it usually means you are arrogant. If you aspire to serve others, you are always trying to remain coachable.

 

“Winning is defined by the legacy you create.” @TheRobertD

 

Here are a few highlights from our discussion:

  • Anyone can have a personal brand. “Whether you think it or not, you are a brand.” How you look, dress, talk is part of your brand.

Procrastinate on Purpose

Learn How to Be A Multiplier

If you’ve tried all of the tips, tricks, tools, apps, checklists, planners and technology gimmicks to improve your productivity, you may wonder why it is that you still haven’t mastered your time.

 

“Creating the next level of results requires the next level of thinking.” –Rory Vaden

 

My friend Rory Vaden, cofounder of international company Southwestern Consulting, NYT bestselling author of Take the Stairs: 7 Steps to Achieving True Success, says that:

  • Everything you know about time management is wrong.
  • The most productive people in the world do things differently.
  • We need to understand the emotional aspects of time management.
  • We need to learn how to multiply our time.
  • We need to learn how to procrastinate on purpose.

9780399170621His new book, Procrastinate on Purpose: 5 Permissions to Multiply Your Time has just been released. A few weeks ago, I sat down with Rory to talk about his extensive research into time management.

If you want to be more productive, more effective, more impactful – and who doesn’t – Rory’s research will propel you along.

3 Types of Procrastination

Learn about the 3 different types of procrastination:

7 Lessons on Giving from Jimmy Wayne

 

Walk to Beautiful

One of the most moving and true stories I have ever read is Walk to Beautiful: The Power of Love and a Homeless Kid Who  Found the Way, the story of Jimmy Wayne.  Jimmy is a country music singer-songwriter whose songs have topped the charts.  His song “Do You Believe Me Now?” was played over 100,000,000 times on the radio earning him the millionaire award. He is also now a NYT bestselling author and has a movie based on his book Paper Angels.  With all that success, he still identifies himself more as a foster kid who faced numerous challenges growing up in a difficult system.

Recently, I was visiting Nashville and met Jimmy at an event to raise money for the Salvation Army.

 

Saved By Love

Do you know how this country music star got his first guitar?  If you have participated in the Salvation Army Angel Tree Program, you will have the answer. That anonymous gift was the beginning of a musical journey.  Each year children in need fill out angel tags containing gift wishes and place them on a tree.  Jimmy received his first guitar through this program.  You can make a dream come true by helping others through the Salvation Army’s program.

After reading his compelling story and speaking with him, I thought about 7 lessons Jimmy Wayne taught me about giving and sharing.

Jimmy taught me to:

 

1. Give the gift of encouragement.

As a homeless teenager, Jimmy befriended an elderly couple, who took him in. When he speaks of this couple, and the words of love and appreciation they expressed to him, you will be reminded of the power of encouragement.  Contrast that to the words spoken by a prison guard; words that, to this day, still seem to haunt him.

Use every opportunity to encourage others with words of love and appreciation.

 

2.  Give with no expectation.

So often we give and expect something back.  True givers experience the joy of giving with no expectation.  Anything given with an expectation is not really a gift.

“Anything given with an expectation is not really a gift.” -Skip Prichard

 

3.  Give of yourself.

Bea Costner opened her home to Jimmy, gave of her time, her talent, and her love. She demonstrated the power of giving is when it comes from the heart with nothing held back.

“The power of giving is when it comes from the heart and nothing is held back.”

 

4.  Give your unique giftedness.

Influencing Others The Go-Giver Way

Service and Influence

 

Bob Burg is a first-class speaker, author, and friend.  His books have sold hundreds of thousands of copies:  Endless Referrals, The Go-Giver, and Adversaries into Allies: Win People Over Without Manipulation or Coercion.

Recently, I had the opportunity to hear Bob speak.  His platform skills were on full display.  I watched him mesmerize the audience with his energy and command of the stage.  He inspired everyone to make a difference with his message of service and influence.

After his terrific presentation, I had the opportunity to talk with Bob about serving others and influence.  In this video, we discuss:

  • The importance of service and giving to others
  • How to change a corporate culture
  • How to get commitment rather than compliance
  • How to reset a frame
  • Why his books resonate with so many

If you are looking for an inspirational gift that you will want to pass on to others, I highly recommend The Go-Giver.  His latest book, Adversaries into Allies: Win People Over Without Manipulation or Coercion, may be his most important work as it compiles success principles and a lifetime of learning.

Some of my favorite Bob Burg quotes:

 

“Money is an echo of value.” –Bob Burg

 

“Giving is not a strategy. It’s a way of life.” –Bob Burg

 

“A frame is the foundation from which everything evolves.” –Bob Burg

 

“Influence is the ability to move a person to a desired action.” –Bob Burg

 

“Great influencers attract others.” –Bob Burg